Here is a letter I received today from Andi…
Hello there. I read your recent post about how some people truly experienced diaper punishment as children. My story is a bit different, but completely true.
I grew up with a very loving mother and occasionally abusive father. I say occasionally, because most of the time he was a decent father. He supported the family, went to my extra curricular events, etc. However, every few months, he would go out drinking with his friends. He got very mean when he was drunk and my mother would lock me in my room on nights he went out drinking. She would rather he abuse her than me.
This is where the diaper come into the picture. Hearing him yell at my mom would scare me senseless and I would often wet the bed out of fear. This was a common theme on nights I was locked in my room, so she decided that diapers would solve that problem. Throughout my childhood, any night my dad would go out drinking, I spent the night diapered and locked in my room. As I got older, it became a fetish. I have no idea why. It just happened.
Currently, I am 43 years old and live with an amazing man that keeps me in diapers most weekends. He is strict, but caring and I love him completely. We are both huge fans of your web site. Please keep up the great work!
Okay, it’s been a while since I posted here. I thought I would just merge the blog into my main site, but people keep asking me to update this blog. I guess I will just post my thoughts and stories here. =)
Anyway, I’ve been meaning to talk about some things I’ve noticed after talking to many girls about how they came to enjoy diaper punishment. One in particular that I heard about the other day…
This girl was raised by her mother and had a single sister. When she hit puberty and started getting her period, she would often not pay attention to certain things and her pad would leak. This would inevitably lead to stains on the furniture. After the first couple times that this happened, her mother started forcing her to wear diapers during her period. She didn’t make her use the diapers for potty priveledges, except one time when she threw a fit about being forced to wear diapers to school. Her mother allowed her to stay home, but insisted that for that week she would not be allowed to use the toilet. Her mother relented on forcing her to mess after the first time, but insisted she use the diaper for #1 until her period was over.
Many people will insist that stories like this are not true. I, however, believe her completely. I have personally witnessed diaper punishment being used on friends of mine(hence the start of my own fetish). There are also a lot of similar stories from other girls. Of course, some might be made up fantasies, but very few of them seemed far fetched to me.
What people don’t realize is back in the day(for people age 30+ in general), parents often believed that children wet the bed because they were lazy, or acting out, or any number of other ridiculous reasons. They truly believed that the best way to get their kids to stop wetting the bed was to humiliate them into wanting to stop. Humiliation was also used often to punish kids for bad behavior. Some of these seem less harsh than diaper punishment(dunce caps, announcing their bad behavior in front of others, etc), but parents back then didn’t think diaper punishment was any worse.
There are, however, some points to be made about these anecdotes. The vast majority were not forced to use their diapers. The humiliation was in the form of exposing them to others while wearing diapers. Some were forced to use their diapers, but that really seems to be a minority. Also, most were not publically humiliated while diapered. They were most often only exposed to their family members, primarily as a means of instilling fear of similar punishment in their siblings.
That being said, I very much enjoy reading your own anecdotal stories of how you were diaper punished. Please keep sending them in. =)
I had an interesting morning with a semi-local diaper girl. Usually when I do a diaper punishment session I call the shots, though I respect their limits. This girl was insistent on following something of a script however, and when I finally agreed we set up some time for this morning. Her script was not very detailed, so I knew this was going to be a short session. Regardless it turned out rather satisfying.
She shows up at my door at the appointed time and I invite her in. I bring up the subject of a safeword, but she insists on playing without one. So, I lead her up the stairs to my room where I had everything prepared. I stripped off her clothes and laid her across the bed on her back. Three bambino diapers were placed under her ass – the two inner diapers being slit to allow drainage through to the third. Her legs were then raised and three glycerin suppositories were inserted as deep into her ass as I could push them with my finger. One at a time I fastened the diapers as tightly as I could without ripping them. This was followed by a pair of locked plastic pants she had brought with her. I placed one of my own padlocks through the chain in the small of her back. One of the two keys was placed inside an envelope I had previously addressed to her apartment. This was later dropped in the mailbox to be delivered to her place in a day or two.
Next I stood her up and started threading a long nylon rope around her body. The rope was tied in such a way that she could be suspended from two hooks in the ceiling with most of her weight resting on the part of the rope that went between her legs. Once suspended a few inches off the ground, the rope between her legs was pulled very tightly against the triple thick diapers, forcing them into her ass crack. The point of this bondage was to prevent her from messing while the suppositories gave her intense cramps. As per her script, she was gagged and left suspended in that position for three hours. Every ten or fifteen minutes I would tease and torment her by tickling her feet or smacking the back of her thighs with a paddle. Despite the obvious discomfort, she seemed to be in a great headspace. I’m pretty sure she even had an orgasm at one point.
After her three hours was up, I let her down and removed the gag. I made us some lunch and we sat down to eat. In the middle of lunch, the suppositories she had been holding all that time did their job and she made quite the stinky mess. We discussed how things went and she was very pleased. After lunch, she got dressed – still wearing the triple thick and now very messy diapers - and headed home. She will be locked into those diapers until the key I dropped in the mailbox reaches her. She only lives about 90 miles away, but today is Sunday so she won’t be receiving the key until Tuesday. I realized after she left that she probably didn’t realize there is no mail service today.
Scripted or not, I learned some new tricks today. That was a lot of fun and I hope she comes back again. Maybe she will eventually allow me to video tape it.
First of all, I just want to say I love your blog and your site. Thank you for all your hard work bringing those of us into diaper punishment some real content to enjoy. I also wanted to share one of my own experiences and hope you are able to post it on your blog. A lot of people will not believe the following story, but I assure you it is very true. Some of the details might be hazy as it’s been quite a few years since it played out, but the general story is accurate.
When I was nineteen, my dad kicked me out of the house because his new girlfriend didn’t like me. He said I was old enough to earn my own way and gave me two days to be out. Without many options, I stayed with one friend after another while working a minimum wage job at a gas station. After a few months wearing out my welcome with friends, I went to stay with another friend and his mother. She was very accomodating and told me I could stay as long as I needed. She often pushed me to go to community college and get some kind of degree so I could get a real job and support myself correctly.
After a few months, her son Ben(my friend) decided to join the military and went off to boot camp. With him gone, I figured I would have to find a new place to live but his mother(Mary) insisted I could still stay as long as I needed. However, with Ben gone she began to act a little differently than normal. She became very abrupt and would give me a list of chores to do every day. If I was slow of failed to finish them to her satisfaction, she would say things like “You’re lucky I don’t beat your ass”. It was confusing at first, but after a couple weeks she told me that she had found my stash of femdom porn and read the fantasy stories I had written about being dominated by my friend’s mother.
I was quite embarassed, but she insisted we discuss it. After a lengthy conversation she was convinced that despite my hesitance about the subject, it was actually something I was very interested in. So, she told me that my room and board was now contingent on my ability to obey. The new rules were that I would do as I was told when I was told, I would enroll at the local community college and I would quit my job at the gas station so I could focus on schoolwork. Failure to follow her rules would be met with harsh punishment.
To emphasize how serious she was, she ordered me to drop my pants and lie across her lap. I wasn’t sure how to react at first, but the look in her eye told me she was very serious. I slowly dropped my pants around my knees and moved into position over her lap. She grabbed my right arm and twisted it behind my back to hold me in place. Then she pulled my underwear down and in a disgusted tone admonished me for the skidmarks she found there. After a tongue lashing about hygiene, she proceeded to lay into my ass with her hand. After fifty swats I was fighting tears and struggling to get off her lap, but with my feet unable to get leverage on the floor and hands useless I just had to endure her punishment. I lost count, but somewhere around one hundred swats she told me the spanking would continue until I gave in and cried. This first punishment was less about inflicting pain and more about putting me in a vulnerable headspace. A few quick swats later and I was sobbing.
After the spanking, she led me to a corner and placed me there like a child with orders not to move until she said I could. My pants and underwear were now around my ankles and my ass was on fire. I continued to sob to myself in the corner as I contemplated what was happening. This had always been a fantasy of mine, but the reality was not quite the same. The spanking hurt and I dislike pain, but as I stood in the corner I became aware that just thinking about what just happened had given me a raging hardon. After a couple hours in the corner, she told me I could pull my pants back up and finish the list of chores she had given me earlier in the day.
The next few weeks saw a lot of changes around the house. I was no longer employed and was waiting for the next semester of community college to start. I spent most of each day doing my chores the best I could. I only earned one more spanking in that first few weeks when I forgot to trim the grass at the bottom of the fence when I mowed. That spanking was more about punishment than putting me in my place. I was just a quick fifty swats and an hour in the corner. This few weeks did lead up to the next stage in my submission though.
One of the biggest issues she had with me was my hygiene. I showered every day and brushed my teeth regularly, but apparently I had a problem with properly wiping my ass. No matter how much I tried to get clean, I ended up with skidmarks in my underwear. So, one day she decided to teach me a lesson and told me if she saw one more skidmark she would put me back in diapers for a week. The very next day she found a skidmark…
Apparently she expected me to fail, because she was already prepared. She walked right into her room and came out a minute later with an assortment of items – baby powder, baby wipes and the largest disposable diaper I had ever seen. I teared up at the thought of wearing a diaper when it became clear she actually intended for me to wear it. My pants were already around my knees, because she had just checked for skidmarks a few minutes before, so she ordered me to remove the pants and underwear and lie on the floor. I wanted to run away, but knew better and did as I was told. She unfolded the diaper and placed it under my ass, then pulled out several wipes and aggressively cleaned my entire ass and pubic region. Once I was clean to her satisfaction, she sprinkled on liberal amounts of baby powder and then pulled the diaper closed and taped it tightly into place.
I was stifling tears from this new humiliation as she told me that I would be in diapers for one week and my toilet priviledges for that week were revoked. The look on my face gave me away as she clarified that meants I had to use the diapers for everything. The tears began to flow freely at this revelation and I began to sob. She simply stated that I was acting like a baby and I should just accept my punishment like a man.
It was a tough week which led to much more intimate domination. It seems changing my wet and messy diapers helped her jump whatever hurdle was holding her back from the more traditional style of female domination. Rather than simply being a maternal figure that ordered me around and punished me when necessary, things took a much more sexual turn. She began buying items at the local adult toy store and practiced using them all on me. The first items she purchased were restraints, butt plugs and a strapon dildo. These types of items were all center stage in my fantasies, but once again reality was quite different. The fantasy of being bound was incredible, but the reality was that several hours in tight bondage was very uncomfortable. Couple that with a huge butt plug in your ass that makes you constantly feel like you have to take a dump and it really sucks. On the flip side, however, after an intense domination session my fantasies are fueled tenfold. Hate it when it’s actually happening, but love it afterward.
Anyway, after a week in diapers I was allowed to go back to my normal clothes. This didn’t last long though, because Mary realized that she very much enjoyed having me in diapers. So, diapers became a permanent part of my wardrobe simply because she liked them. I got used to hiding them under my clothes and before long I didn’t even give them a second thought. That was just my life for the next three years. It all ended when my friend Ben became injured while serving in the military. He came back home so his mother could help care for him as he recovered. We couldn’t continue this relationship with him around and he was going to be around for a long time. I had gotten my degree by this point, so I found a good paying job and moved on with my life. I’ve had a couple of femdom relationships since, but none quite as good as Mary. Maybe some day I will find that again.
Ona contacted me quite some time ago, but was having difficulty finding the time to come see me. Well, this last week she finally found a full day to herself and made the long drive up to see me. She has been craving some serious diaper punishment for a long time and we discussed her desires by email at length. To be honest, we emailed back and forth for so long I was beginning to wonder if she was really a he just looking for some cyber. Unfortunately, that is all too common.
I was quite pleased when she did finally show up at my door. We had discussed her fantasies at length many times, so I got right down to business. I ordered her to strip down and when I found her in panties instead of a diaper, she had already earned her first punishment. First I got her into a diaper and berated her for disappointing me so early. Then I gave her a onesie and a pair of shortalls to wear and let her know what a big baby she was for not following the rules.
Her apprehension was apparent as I prepared the enema bag and led her to the back room where the pillory was waiting. Afraid she might back out, I rushed her along and got her locked into the pillory. I had the gag ready in case I started to hear stronger apprehension. Once locked in, I exposed her ass, lubed up the nozzle, inserted it into her and inflated it. She took a full 1.5 quarts of clear water rather quickly. I was tempted to refill the bag and keep going, but didn’t want to overwhelm her the first time.
Once the nozzle was removed and the diaper pulled back up into place, she was clearly fighting the urge to release into the diaper. I told her if she could hold it for fifteen minutes, I would release her to use the toilet, but within a few minutes I could see the telltale signs of leakage. Before long she was wearing a very wet and messy diaper.
After a few hours waddling around in a messy diaper, I hosed her off with cold water in the shower and then filled her ass with a large butt plug in case there were any remnants of the enema left. I didn’t want to smell a dirty diaper while I tried to eat. After inserting the plug, I gave her a good paddling so she would be extra uncomfortable when she sat to eat dinner.
By this time, our time had come to an end. She had to get back home to work the next day. She confessed she almost gave in and used our safeword at times, but was glad she didn’t and promised to come back as soon as possible. I look forward to it.
This is a cool letter I got from Roger. I think it’s a great story, even though it’s not particularly diaper punishment related.
I noticed that most of the letters and such I see posted online about how people came to develop their diaper fetish as children. Figured I would relate my story, as it happened in adulthood for me.
Several years ago, I developed a tumor in my prostate and the doctor insisted surgery was the best option. The tumor turned out to be benign, but they removed it anyway. During the surgery, however, the surgeon nicked the wrong nerve and afterwards I experienced total urinary incontinence. Here I was, a 30 year old guy that couldn’t control his own bladder. To make matters worse, the incontinence I experienced was such that I didn’t just piss myself all the time. I simply felt no urge to go at all and when my bladder would fill up, the flow would start. This type of heavy wetting made slim undergarments pointless. I ended up wearing full fledged adult diapers usually reserved for bowel incontinence.
Self pity was the new rule and my wife saw it very clearly. She wanted to make sure I still felt like a man, so she began to incorporate the diapers into our sex life. She would curl up next to me in bed and start rubbing my crotch through the diaper and telling me she thought the diaper was sexy. I knew it was an act, but she refused to give it up. Before long, I had simply accepted the diapers and she continued to treat them like a sexy outfit.
Since she was particularly fond of giving blowjobs, we quickly learned that the only way to avoid a disgusting accident was to make sure I wet the diaper right before sex, thereby ensuring I would have an accident during sex. She would often place her hand on my crotch and coax me to pee when she was feeling particularly horny. She would rub just below my belly button until my bladder emptied. After wetting, she would remove the diaper and wipe me down in a very sexy manner and then either climb on top or go down on me.
After nearly a year, my body managed to recover enough that I regained some control of my bladder. I could now sense when my bladder was getting full and could run to the restroom to use the toilet. Diapers were still necessary when not near a restroom for another several months, but I am now completely continent again. Regardless of my newfound control, I still wear diapers all too often. We had such great times when they were needed that we now use them to keep our sex life smoking hot.
A dear friend of mine, and a favorite diaper girl online, has decided to open her very own site. Yes, she is doing it in hopes of making a little extra money, but that doesn’t change the fact that she is very gorgeous and very real. Check out her great new site and leave a comment for her.
The following is a letter from Laura detailing the type of diaper punishment she needs. Enjoy!
Finally, I will meet you Master to have my session with you. I enter your house and as soon as you recognize me, you will ask me to get down on the floor so you can put my collar on, ordering me to crawl following you to the other room. In that room you have a pillory ready to be used . Along with some adult diapers, short nightie, paddle, vibrated butt plug and a huge water bottle that is full of kinda warm water mixed with some yogurt.
Our session will start with me getting naked except for my panties. After that a really hard spanking will take place on my bare butt while my panties is hanging on my knees. Until my master is satisfied with the red marks on my butt, he will keep giving me some hot swats.
Later, I’ll lie on the floor and he is gonna put me on a thick diaper then he will put me in that pillory . I’ll stay there of a whole hour. Each 15 min, Master will come and slightly open my diaper from the back so he can pour a big cup of that warm liquid. Then he will tease me with massaging it with his fingers so he can make sure that I’m all wet down there. After the next 30 min, the diaper will look really wet which calls for another thick diaper and maybe a third one of it if Master thinks so.
When the hour ends, I’ll be out of the pillory with a heavy diaper on. Master will ask me to stay in it for the next 3 hours . While I’m on my 3 hours, I’ve to do the chores that Master asked me to do, You can imagine how hard it is to work with those wet diapers expecting your Master pouring another cup at any moment. Since I’m not used to wet my diaper cause it’s my fantasy, I have to hold it till the 3 hours end. But who knows what I can do? that’s why Master warned me not to let it go. If so, it will feel the humiliation of a REAL wet diaper for another hour with a but plug doing it’s tricky thing from time to time. That’s not it, if I can’t hold it while I’m working . I’ve to agree on another session of unexpected punishment with no rules or limit because Master knows better !
The following is a true life account of the diaper punishment I endured from the ages of ten to thirteen. I have told this story before and have had many people claim it couldn’t possibly have happened. You just need to keep in mind that I am 41 years old and grew up in the seventies. Things were much different back them. Children were spanked often and I don’t mean a pat on the butt. I mean a butt blistering, can’t sit for a week ass whooping. Many parents also used humiliation as a form of control or punishment. If you didn’t grow up in those times, you are lucky.
Anyway, I started puberty when I was ten years old. There were a lot of things in body going through changes. It somehow affected my bladder and led to me wetting my bed. The first couple times it happened, my mother just told me accidents happen and not to worry about it. After four wet beds in two weeks though, she was not pleased. She insisted I was simply too lazy to get out of bed and use the toilet, so she began to punish me when I wet the bed. It started off with spankings, but when the bedwetting didn’t stop she escalated to diaper punishment.
One day at the grocery store, she walked down the baby aisle and started perusing the baby diapers. She grabbed a big box of the largest size Pampers(yes they came in a box back then) and commented that hopefully they would fit me. Knowing that she intended those diapers for me, I was suddenly struck by intense embarassment at walking around the store with diapers in the cart. Of course, in hindsight, most people would assume I had a baby sibling, but my ten year old mind insisted everyone knew they were for me. On the way home, she told me that from now on I will wear diapers to bed every night. And if I wake up wet, I will wears diapers the entire next day as well. If I stayed dry for one solid week, I would not be required to wear diapers to bed anymore.
It only took a couple days before I wet the bed again. Of course, this time I wet the diaper. When Mom found out, she told me that I knew the rules. She also added that diapers were expensive, so she would change me after I pooped. As per my daily routine, that poop came shortly after breakfast. I didn’t think there was any way I would be able to poop in a diaper, but the cramps didn’t give me much choice. When I went to tell Mom what I had done so she could change me, she told me she was busy with her needlepoint and would change me when she was done. That was two hours later.
Many people tell stories about how they weren’t allowed to cover their diapers or were purposely humiliated with public displays, but that never happened to me. I wore normal clothes every day, but I had a diaper on under my pants some days. Unfortunately, that also included school days, though she would always change me promptly after a messy diaper on school days.
This went on for over two years and I never did manage to stay dry for an entire week. In fact, at some points, I was diapered for a week or more thanks to nightly wetting. The wetting slowed down as my body began to settle into it’s post puberty stage and stopped altogether when I was almost fourteen. According to my therapist, and it makes sense to me, my diaper fetish and desire for diaper punishment was most likely triggered by the diaper punishment treatment during the most formative period of my sexual life – puberty.
Unlike most people, I was not very good at hiding my diaper fetish from my mother. Either I was just lazy or, as my therapist seems to think, I intentionally left my cache of fetish stuff in an easy to find location hoping to get caught.
You see, my mother was the snooping type and found my first stash when I was thirteen years old. In my stash, I had a several stories I had written about being forced to wear diapers and being treated like a baby against my will. I also had a few baby diapers that were far too small for me, but I used to just rub myself with them when masturbating. Being the snoopy mother she is, she made sure to read everything I wrote and then told me how disgusting and disturbing it was as she spanked me. She found my new stash a couple more times over the next year and both times I got the same treatment.
When I was fourteen, I made a huge discovery at a local second hand store. I found my first ever bag of adult diapers. They only cost two dollars, but I was too embarassed to carry them up to the register and pay for them, so I stuck them under my coat and walked out the front door. Big mistake. It was clear I was trying to steal them and they dragged me back into the store. The cops came and called my mother and she had to come down and pick me up. She had to pay for the diapers I tried to steal and I knew I was in big trouble.
When we got home, I got the worst spanking of my life. Then, to my surprise, she handed me one of the diapers and told me to put it on. It was incredibly embarassing to be putting on a diaper in front of someone that clearly didn’t approve of my fetish, but I knew better than to disobey her. As I taped the diaper into place, she grabbed a pair of sweatpants from my room and had me put them on backwards. I wasn’t sure why she wanted them backwards until after I had them on. She pulled the drawstring tight around my waist and tied it tightly in the small of my back. She double knotted it and tugged it hard to ensure I couldn’t untie it myself. I was basically locked into my diaper. She was clearly still upset with me, but said nothing until she sent me to bed at eight o’clock.
When I woke up in the morning, I needed to pee as usual. It was at this point that I realized I didn’t know if she intended for me to pee in the diaper or ask her for help. Not wanting to make another mistake, I found her in the kitchen and told her I needed to use the toilet. She just looked at me and said “You’re wearing it”. Clearly she intended for me to use the diaper. When I began to pout, she shot me a dark look and insisted that I was only getting what I always wanted. Realizing she was right, I went back to my room and wet my first diaper since babyhood.
After breakfast, it donned on me that diapers weren’t just for peeing in as the urge to have my after breakfast bowel movement set in. Once again, not wanting to piss off my mother, I let her know that I needed to go number two. At this point, she gave me a long speech about how I had crossed the line by stealing diapers to feed my disgusting fetish and that the only way she could think to break me of it is to give me exactly what I wanted, so I could see that it isn’t as fun as the fantasy. I took this to mean I was meant to have a messy diaper as well.
Ten minutes later, I was sitting in a very wet and messy diaper. When my mother smelled it, she told me to play outside until lunch, because I was stinking up her house. As I walked out the door, she told me if I was good she would change me at lunch time. As much as I had fantasized about just this, reality was clearly not as good as fantasy. It was embarassing and uncomfortable and I just sat outside fearing that my friends might show up and find out I was wearing a messy diaper. I wanted this to end and swore to myself I would never fantasize about diapers again.
At lunch time, mother came and got me. She took me to the bathroom and untied my pants. Then, she had me lie on the floor as she untaped the diaper and wiped me clean with a dozen wet paper towels. Once clean, she told me to take a shower while she finished fixing lunch and to wait for her in my room after my shower. At this point, I figured my diaper punishment was over and that I would get either a spanking, a lecture or both after my shower.
Instead, I was met with yet another diaper. I began to tear up when I realized I would be spending another day in a diaper, but my mother just explained that my punishment was to wear diapers until the diapers I tried to steal were gone. She then made a point of counting the diapers in the bag and announcing there were still nine diapers left, which meant nine more days in diapers with one diaper change a day. She followed with a comment that more diapers could be purchased if I didn’t do as I was told. This time I was not given a pair of pants to wear as mom told me to come down and have some lunch. In fact, I spent most of the next nine days wearing nothing more than a diaper and a t-shirt.
The embarassment of wearing diapers in front of my mother quickly wore off, but I was still mortified at the idea of being found out by my friends. Spending one embarassing day in diapers was enough to make me swear off my fetish, but ten days in diapers had the opposite effect. Because I had gotten used to wearing diapers in front of my mother, I began to enjoy it again. Of course, I didn’t tell her that, but I was incredibly tempted to do something stupid so she would buy more diapers. The only thing that stopped me was the knowledge that she would probably take the punishment up a notch and maybe send me to the park in a diaper with my pants or something. In hindsight, I know she would never do that, but in the mind of a kid I figured it was likely.
On the tenth day of diaper punishment, mom took me to the drug store. She shopped for the normal stuff she usually bought, but then took a stroll down the adult diaper aisle as she carefully glanced at the diapers on the shelves. She picked up on bag and commented that they must be extra thick diapers, because there was only a dozen diapers in that huge bag. I began to wonder what rule I had broken to earn more time in diapers and began to panic at the thought of being embarassed in front of my friends. She realized what I was thinking and quickly told me that these were going to be put in her closet for the next time she found dirty stories in my room.